Baby bible:the first year - daytime sleeps (naps)

Ok, back to the dreaded issue-sleep.

For me I believe daytime sleep and nightime sleep go hand in hand. If you sort your routine and your baby is getting the right about of daytime sleep, it will help with the nights.

However, that can be easier said than done.



I came across a number of different fights during the first four months or so, then things settled down. This included:

• self settling issues
• the 45 minute nap problem
• screaming when put down
• being put down and waking after ten minutes
• overtired
• undertired

To be honest I had it all.

To set the story out a little bit when Minnie was first born I genuinely didn't realise that you had to teach your baby to sleep. I thought it was something that you would pop them into their little basket at nap time and they would drift off into the land of nod. How wrong I was! In the beginning people were always cuddling her, or she'd drop off when she was being fed, pushed somewhere or in the car so it was generally ok.

At about 6 weeks I had a bit of a meltdown as she wasn't napping when she was meant to so I began trying lots of different things. Between 2.5 and 3.5 months she was great. Would simply play under her gym and then drop off when she was tired, wake up, feed, play - rinse repeat. But then we had a regression. I don't know what changed, but I had to start all over again. I felt like I had a newborn again, it was blimmin awful.

No, I don't think naps are as easy as bedtime. Things change in your baby's life, you change the number of naps, length etc during the first year. Please see my post on routine within this baby bible series.

So, there's a few things to consider...

Location

Where do you want your baby to nap? I wanted her to sleep in her cot on the whole as I felt this helped with bedtime sleep.

Understand the hard points

For us, Minnie always struggled with the last sleep of the day. So fir this one I would often 'give in' and not fight the self settling fight, and let her sleep in the baby carrier while I got on with some things round the house, as I knew she needed the last sleep or our evening would be hell!

Focus on awake time

Rather than looking at when they should sleep, or how much time they're asleep, focus more on awake time. If you can understand that your baby has a certain duration that they can be awake before wanting a sleep, you can probably crack the other bits. Most issues, e.g. short naps, difficulty settling etc are a result of putting your baby down at the wrong time. Really watch your baby and understand them. Don't have the telly on (just until you understand the awake time - then by all means stick Jezza back on to make yourself feel better that you're not one of them), just focus on them. What are their tired signs? Minnie had a three yawn warning. First yawn I would pick her up and start to calm her down, second yawn go to where she would be sleeping, and then on the third yawn she was tucked up ready for the land of nod.

The awake time does change, so when they become harder to settle or are waking up after a shorter time period adjust their waking time and see if it helps. Do this bit by bit.

Sleep aids and sleep training

Please read what I've said about sleep aids and sleep training here.

Having calm down routine

I used a condensed version of our bedtime routine to still signify to Minnie that it was almost time for her nap. I found this really useful, and I genuinely believe this is why she's so great at naps now. I used to:

• carry her for a bit so she settled down
• go upstairs and close curtains etc saying goodbye Mr sunshine
• Read a story

Troubleshooting

And finally, I thought it might be handy to include a quick fire list of troubleshooting tips, but please leave me any questions in the comments section.

• Self settling issues - make sure they are actually just ready to go to bed. Look at the tired signs and work with them. Try pat shush if they struggle and you're sure it's the right time.
• The 45 minute nap problem - it could be that they're undertired. If you don't think it's that it could be part of sleep regression. Try wake to sleep so they don't wake up after each cycle - I knew Minnie would wake up after 45 minutes dead on, so once she'd been down for 40 minutes I'd sneak into her room, stroke her cheek to make her stir, and restart the sleep cycle.
• Screaming when put down - this is a toughie and it depends on the kind of person you are. I did controlled comforting so would pick up, soothe and once settled put back down. Repeat until they know that you will be coming back.
• Being put down and waking after ten minutes - adjust your awake time
• Overtired - sometimes all good Mums fail. If you've not managed to get them to go off, and they're into full overtired meltdown mode, give in! Do whatever you can to get them to sleep this time, and start again next time round.

And if nothing else remember, this too shall pass.